With that said, moving onward: I am totally Doomed.

I made shrimpy pasta two days ago (I know, I checked my tweets.) I saved some, as I was not hungry enough or endowed with a large enough stomach to eat all that I had prepared. A mere two days later I find myself scarfing down the remainder, heated from its chill in the fridge.

And it looks like that was a bad idea.

I’m sitting here, blogging, a ticking time bomb. I can feel inside me that something went wrong and I’m totally going to be so sick. The food didn’t smell bad, it didn’t look bad, and I heated it up in a perfectly acceptable manner (fry pan and extra virgin olive oil) but I know. I know it’s all down hill from here.

I’ve taken my pepto bismol. I’ve brought the ginger ale out of the basement to the main fridge. I know where the chicken soup is.

But it’s the waiting.

And! And and and! Even if I’m not going to be sick I’m going to be sick anyway! Because the mind is a powerful thing and if I truly believe I’m going to be sick and I’m wrong, it won’t matter. Because I wasn’t going to be sick but I believe so fervently that I am that I’ll probably make myself sick.

Double screwed.

And now we wait.

I do enjoy considering myself Termination Zero. The epicenter of the entire downfall. The sign of the worsening. The precursor to the age of whatever the exact opposite of enlightenment is. I’m Termination Zero, Patient Zero, because it’s amusing in a grim sort of way and because it’s awfully coincidental.

And it’s not a disease so I have the ‘pleasure’ of watching the survivors suffer. But there’s no pleasure there. Not in the least. The grim amusement comes from the obvious failings of the powers that be, so much higher up in the corporation, who have no idea at all of what they’re doing. They’ve never spent a minute in the trenches of the war zone that is the sales floor. They’ve never had it out with one of the machines.

That, I believe, is a fact.

And it’s amusing and interesting because while OF COURSE it does not hold a candle to a battle or a war, it IS easy and is that kind of darkly, grim half-smilingly comparable to a war.

One that you’re on the front lines of. One that you’re losing.

Or one where you’ve received a dishonorable discharge.

The story is about eggs. It’s about giraffes. It’s about the place where I felt I belonged. The place where I was awesome. The place where I knew everything and everyone knew me and I knew everyone.

The place where we were united.

And the place where I got myself fired from due to curiosity and hubris.

Hubris is my new word. I find it applies often.

There are a lot of people who would be entertained to see our story written. There are a lot of people who would read it.

And there are a few people who would probably stop just short of having us killed if we told it.

If that’s not amusing, I don’t know what is.

I’m referring mostly to the recent Facebook scandals and whatnot, which I actually know very little about because it sounds like a whole lot of nothing. Now, I’m also aware that it could be a huge something, I just fail to see that being too true, and while it is of course impossible to know without actually reading about it, well, that is simply me not doing what is potentially good for me, plain and simple. So be aware this is the outlook of someone without benefit of actual information.

See, a lot more than a tweet.

All I’m really saying is that I don’t know anything about the Facebook privacy issues and if what I’ve seen happen is a result of it, I don’t really care either. Naturally I’m referring to one isolated example which probably has no bearing on the rest of reality.

I’m using Pandora Internet Radio to find new artists I might be interested in by creating radio stations based on songs or artists I enjoy currently. Today, a little bar pops down from the top of the window and says that Pandora is now utilizing information from my Facebook profile to better suit my listening experience to me.

I don’t know how it did this. I don’t know what nefarious channels had to be traversed to link my Facebook profile to my Pandora radio station without me even logging into Pandora properly. But if this is the unreasonable dissemination of personal information people are up in arms about, I have to say, I don’t mind.

In fact, this led me to find out one of my favorite bands had a new album I’d been unaware of which I popped right over to iTunes to buy. This, I believe, is some kind of targeted marketing scheme. And I don’t mind that either.

If it becomes overbearing, or if they manage to know things they shouldn’t know or I’d feel better with them not knowing (and nothing exactly comes to mind immediately) then I’ll probably become upset. Until then, the privacy issue doesn’t push any of my buttons too badly.

However. If I did not have a job and money, it could lead to small time piracy. But I probably wouldn’t do that because I let myself believe that my purchase actually matters to the artist somehow.

So. Yup.

Pay:
FTP: Transmit 4

Yesterday, a person in scrubs came to give me my CPAP machine (Constant Positive Airway Pressure) which is a device to combat sleep apnea, which I have been informed I have rather badly.

This is, in short, a condition where one stops breathing in one’s sleep long enough to interrupt the sleep cycle, which essentially negates that sleep. These episodes happen many times in a night, and a whole bunch, like I have, wrecks the night. So I sleep and sleep and sleep to no positive end. Two hours, four, eight, twelve, doesn’t matter the amount of time, I wake up feeling like I haven’t slept at all to speak of.

So now there’s the machine.

It’s a bit of a nuisance. I have to sleep with a face mask on which is connected to a tube which is connected to a humidifier device which is part of an air pump (but it’s actually rather neat and compact). And, true to its name, there is constant air pressure on my nose and mouth – an amount I’ve been told is the equivalent to being thirteen centimeters under water. I’m not certain of that though.

So. It took me a while to get to sleep. I’d estimate somewhere around thirty or forty minutes. I hope it gets easier. I wasn’t incredibly tired at that point so that probably had something to do with it as well. The cats were also crawling around, fascinated by this new development. That time must have been around one, so when I naturally woke up later, it had only been about five or so hours. However, as a result of that five hours I felt at least as refreshed as I do on any given night, likely more so.

Indeed, as I got up, fed the cats, did my daily push ups with appreciable ease, made pancakes because I’d had a hankering last night, and ate them. Then I did the dishes and cleaned the kitty litter. I’ve already bested my typical daily productivity and it’s not even eight in the morning.

However! There are things to consider. First of all it wasn’t the immediate cure I’d promised myself despite the obvious counter indications that it could be. (Physically impossible). However, the sleep related results are, mostly, immediate, which does match what I’d been promised by people who know what they’re talking about.

Also consider: pancakes don’t help anyone. It’s raining, which can dampen things literally and metaphorically. And, crucially, I’m not confident in my wakefulness – that is to say I’m not necessarily feeling 100%. I’m awake and alert but I do feel it could potentially slip.

So. We shall see.

Update: around 11:15 am. Was in the office for a while. Not sure if it’s boredom or actually not enough sleep but now even with an early lunch, I’m dragging a bit. I wish I was better able to isolate the reason. It IS raining. I AM bored. But I also didn’t sleep a full average 8 hours last night.

Update 2: Yes, I am unhappy. No, I don’t know why I slept the whole day.

• 3.0 GHz Pentium 4 630 (Prescott) Socket 775 (400 MHz FSB/2 MB L2 cache)
• 1 GB (1 DIMM) DDR2-667 MHz RAM
• ECS G31T-M9 Mainboard
• 20 GB ATA/100 Hard Drive
• Radeon HD 4350 256 MB PCI Express x16
• PowerSpec DM-387 mATX Slim Computer Case

It’s not that strong at all, by today’s standards, but it carry’s on reasonably enough under Windows XP SP3, and while it appears to be a fair performer, so much as installing AVG Free took a great deal longer than anything I’ve worked with recently. I can only assume the discreet Radeon HD is a contributor to the decent performance as it eliminates the RAM leeching of the integrated Intel GMA 3100 graphics. While the overly powerful Core2Quad rated fan keeps the CPU cool with almost no noise at all, the single 60mm fan in the case, even throttled to 7 of its 12 volts of power, paired with the budget video card’s cooler, make for quite a noisy system – and not only noisy but at a rather annoying pitch. The slim line case limits alternative VGA coolers as does the overall value of the system as a whole. Still, it would be nice if it would not over heat as a result of the hard drive or produce such an unignorable tone.

Of note? This meager system handles 1080p streaming video (youtube – mega64 – Sonic Sucks) with just the faintest uniform choppiness at full screen. Surprising!

I would like to point out that I’ve envisioned the netbook almost exactly as we know it today for a very long time. So long in fact that I had forgotten that I had myself. I’ve only just remembered today for the first time in a great while that I’ve had the idea since the sixth grade which is probably on the order of thirteen years ago.

I haven’t checked my math.

That thirteen is a staggering number, I’m fully aware.

But at any rate, it’s true. My idea was a small, thin laptop with a low power processor with just enough kick to run all of your standard productivity apps and be able to access the internet. This would have covered seemingly 90% or more of what any given person did with a laptop – the obvious segment left out being users with more mobile workstation laptops rather than just portable computers for productivity. My original ideas relied entirely on usb 1.1 ports, one I think, dial up modems, and 300 MHz processors.

I was reminded in a manner that seems a bit backward, things considered, since what I was actually thinking of earlier was the modern netbook which led to me remembering I’d come up with it, not the other way around. What I was thinking of was what would obviously be a phenomenally narrow niche audience for whom modern netbooks would probably be perfect for, an audience I only thought of because I am one of them and, potentially, the only one (however unlikely that may actually be).

I see netbooks today built around the piddling Intel Atom processors, on their second generation now, and despite the ‘range’ of speeds and features, they aren’t good for much more than viewing, minor document modification, and light internet usage (video and flash highly up for grabs). Video and flash, integral to the internet experience, being the primary reason manufacturers continue to squeeze more strange technology into these tiny laptops to try to increase their capabilities and feature sets which bumps their prices clear past far more capable, although larger and heavier, regular laptop computers. The result is paying more for less machine in a smaller package. The smaller package might actually tip the scale in its favor, but that’s up to the buyer.

The point is that I, in further circular thinking, was considering the device I’d like to type this very piece on. I thought I’d like to write it on a netbook for the exact reason a netbook is kind of an absurd purchase for many computer users.

A netbook can’t exactly do much.

Now, what can a netbook style computer do?

Tons of stuff.

But not too well.

And that’s my rationale for wanting (although not buying) one.

I have grown up with a computer by my side for my entire life. This is a true statement but the details are for another time. The reason I bring it up is because it’s my stated reason for knowing just what a given computer is capable of and suited for. Listing what I use computers for /most/ of the time is very pedestrian. Music, photo archiving and viewing, internet usage in the form of video and reading technical and geek news. However, somewhere along the line I fell into what feels like extreme multitasking and while I’m sure I wouldn’t medal in the event, I manage to tax ever more powerful computers with my mere browsing habits.

I’m getting to the point. I know, I’m getting impatient too.

My quad core struggles with the sheer volume of tabs I may have open at one time. I just find and absorb information – most of it quite useless (but again, for another essay). However, I build my computers to meet my needs and most of the time the latest main machine does it. The multiple cores and gigs of RAM support my video and browsing habits, simple tasks as they may be in their own rights.

But, I realized, that’s part of the problem.

It’s like when my mother packs for a trip. If there is space available, she’ll fill it, regardless of whether she probably needs that thing or not. I’ve absolutely inherited this malady.

But if the computer can handle x, y, AND z tasks, I’ll probably find some odd way of pushing it. I’ll download season 3 while transcoding season 2 while I’m finishing season 1 plus I have 50+ tabs waiting for me ranging from the recent quake to the latest LOLcats. It’s that kind of information overload that is part of how I pretty much am.

Slightly depressing but that’s the third piece for another time.

The point is that a netbook can’t do that. It can’t do a fraction of that. And when I think I want to write something, which I so rarely ever do anymore, odds are I’ll be distracted before I even know what I’m being distracted from.

It happened as I was beginning this very piece on my late 2009 unibody white MacBook. I opened TextEdit, my minimal word processor of choice, and finding the glaring white of the background harsh as I type in the dark in bed, I opened a Safari window to grab WriteRoom, a distraction free word processor I knew of (which at one point had certainly been a tab open and waiting). As I opened the window the ‘top sites’ feature let me see that my favorite web comic had updated and off I went. I had to steer myself back to writing since I really felt like writing up this particular piece.

I don’t know why… I don’t see true reason to. But I did so I am.

At any rate, the netbook isn’t good for much besides things like viewing documents and word processing. Their small screens and cramped keyboards rob them of even championing this menial skill set. But, I thought as I wrenched myself away from Sequential Art, was just what I needed. I needed a computer that wasn’t capable of even running the distractions I am developing ADHD as a result of. Even this MacBook is capable of doing most of what I demand of a computer and it does it fairly well. It shines in a pinch.

It’s too capable, which is why I snagged WriteRoom with it’s charmingly old school green on black decor and… nothing else.

WriteRoom and the incredibly small amount of discipline I possess are probably the only reason this rambling, pointless article got written. And frankly, I hope it works again in the future. Because, aside from the highly dubious virtue I’ve pointed out in fewer words than I’d expected, there ain’ much reason to buy one. I’ve got this MacBook. I’m not intending to spend half its cost again on a much much less capable machine. I already have one really, the keyboard is just too small to use. Aside from that it would be great.

All I’m saying is that the incredibly niche audience is out there. And I’m one of them.

We’ve got the new wave of vampire shows/movies. There’s the crime dramas and the cop mysteries, there’s the hospital dramas, and even a hospital mystery, maybe two, I’m not sure. There’s also more reality shows than should be allowed which are primarily competitions and sometimes just about interactions between people. Recently there have also been some shows just pretty much about blowing shit up.

The key to the next great thing? A page from every book.

The way I see it – we’ll have a handsome but moody and distant vampire who is also a doctor and deals with attempting to distance himself from women who love him as well as the woman he loves while working with his patients who suffer from diseases no one else understands and alternately gruesome acts of violence that the police can’t wrap their minds around. In the pursuit of the antagonists and/or answers, shit blows up. He’s probably got a cop friend that keeps him at arms length because he’s wary and, spoiler alert, things just get worse when he finds out he’s a vampire and, hey, why is a vampire a doctor if he’s not cashing in on the convenient position of being a doctor with access to all that blood?

He’s got his soul, of course. Come on, that should have been obvious.

About two days ago now I remembered I was to be eligible for an ‘incentive pricing’ deal on a new AT&T phone because apparently that avenue opens after one year of a contract. Indeed, I had been eligible for two days at that time and naturally I couldn’t wait for one more minute after this revelation and darted down to the AT&T store and snapped up a new iPhone 3GS.

Did I have an iPhone 3G already? Certainly.
Was it an almost completely integral part of my daily life? Oh yes.
Was I desperate for the massive gains provided by the new hardware? Absolutely.

I do love my iPhone, which is a 3G, but it had been proving too pokey for my tastes. Internet at my fingertips was just not good enough for this technology whore. It had to be at hand faster.

So now there’s a 3GS by my side. I’ve heard the reviews – an average of a 50% speed gain and make no mistake, that is a substantial number to be taken in a positive light.

And it’s true! I haven’t run quantifiable tests but I can tell it’s fast. Fast enough to keep up with me. And that’s a literal statement.

I would find that I could launch, for example, the Messages app for text messaging, and pick the contact of my choosing, and then proceed to type, typically, almost my entire message before the phone caught up and even started displaying the letters.

On the new phone? Not so! It keeps up just like it should. Which, to make a long review less long, is essentially how I feel about the phone. It is good. It is the way the iPhone should be – from a hardware standpoint.

Will there be a new one that’s arguably better one year from now? Yes, most likely. Who knows what it will be capable of! Possibly that video chatting feature fans and speculators alike have been fiending for. We can only hope.

Because despite the fact that I deem myself far too visually unpleasant to appear on video chats, damn it all the feature is terribly tempting.

But as it is, can I now use a compass in conjunction with Google Maps and GPS or just on its own for the hell of it? Yes I can and it’s halfway accurate to boot! Can I now record passable casual video? Yup. Far superior still shots? Yup. Voice commands? Sure can, if I figure out what it actually accepts.

I’m a big fan of the iPhone. AT&T’s service occasionally leaves things to be desired but in this populous area I live in, service is almost always just fine. So hey, good times.